For this post I did a peer review activity for a girl in a different section, she's doing a video essay.
I peer reviewed for Sofia Haserot (section 2), and I did activity 2: the outlining suggestion for her content outline.
Sofia's outline is good because she has a consistent approach, and good evidence for the argument about obamacare.
I think the video essay genre is really good for this project because, as I read in the student writing book, you need a medium that will be most persuasive to your audience and most fitting for your argument-- I think a visually compelling genre will interest people who might not read up on politics found in articles.
She's doing a video essay, and kept in mind that it is still an essay, so it's conventions need paragraphs, essentially. She followed that and organized an intro, then body sections, where she elaborates on the points she's trying to make. I can take from her outline the organization because I always have an issue with having too many ideas in one place or in one project, and I need to cut things to be more concise.
Sofia's outline is good because she has a consistent approach, and good evidence for the argument about obamacare.
An area I think she can develop is her introduction because she sort of assumes that her audience knows all there is to obamacare. I am not well informed on the topic, and probably should be, but I think she should include a general statement explaining what Obamacare entails and some background info before arguing the cons of the program that Obama put in motion.
She's doing a video essay, and kept in mind that it is still an essay, so it's conventions need paragraphs, essentially. She followed that and organized an intro, then body sections, where she elaborates on the points she's trying to make. I can take from her outline the organization because I always have an issue with having too many ideas in one place or in one project, and I need to cut things to be more concise.
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